The Interview from Hell

[Quick back story  - I had an interview to do volunteer work for the semester.]

If I were to believe in hell, I’d imagine it more or less as a giant red lava pit with rivers of lava and fire and horned devils with pitchforks running around or steering the fire-proof gondolas (or as my flamboyantly gay literature professor would describe it, a fire-filled place with tons of men chasing each other wearing only banana hammocks).  However, my hell came in the form of a cluttered office with a patronizing [roughly] 28-year-old Spanish woman.

Why was it hell?  Here’s the short version:

The building itself was semi-hidden in what appeared to be not the safest or well-maintained area of town.  Locals had never heard of the foundation or the street it was on.  The street signs list local names, not the actual names (and only half of the streets have signs).  It was 95+ degrees and I was wearing professional clothing.

The woman I interviewed with (let’s call her… Elena) was not expecting me (bad sign already).  When I tried explaining why I was there and who sent me, she remained clueless and cold.  I showed her the emails I received about the interview, and continue attempting to explain myself, but it all proved fruitless. 

Elena went on to tell me that my Spanish sucked (in only slightly nicer words) and I was the one who was mistaken.  (Seriously).  She told me I couldn’t VOLUNTEER with her.  Elena continued to insult me in Spanish, because she was either a huge bitch (pardon me), or honestly thought I couldn’t understand her.  By this point it was taking every ounce of energy I had to not cry and/or yell at her.  I haven’t learned to be tremendously witty or snide in Spanish yet, so I stuck with the “kill ‘em with kindness approach.”

I felt my face burning with embarrassment and anger.  The combination of the heat and the situation made me feel like this really was hell.  I was expecting that any second Ashton Kutcher would come barging the door because I genuinely thought I was getting “punked.”

I got out of there as fast as I could, sulking my way home on the hour-long metro ride.  I had never felt so embarrassed or small in my life.  Elena was taking pleasure in talking down to me.

Like you always tell me, Mom, everything happens for a reason.  And luckily, it took less than 24-hours to find this reason.

PS – another huge shout out to those of you who spent the rest of the night cheering me up <3

New Additions to the Casa

There are two new and very exciting additions to my Spanish household!

Not ranked:

-A toaster: six-week long craving for toast is officially satisfied.

-A Spanish sister: twenty-year long interest, also satisfied.

I'll update you more in the next few days on interviewing, volunteering, visiting Barcelona, bonding with the familia, and of course, making toast.

A Crazy Film Director, Rice Krispie Treats, Football, and Figs.

Okay, the highlights of the last week or so….

-I’m taking a class on the famous director Almodóvar and he has a new movie out (premiers in American October 14).  It’s called La Piel que Habito (The Skin I Live In) and I saw it in theaters recently.  You should see it and let it mess with your mind Inception-style (although with subtitles you may be a little less daunted than I was).  Read about it here (in English).  Watch a trailer here.  Note: America tends to have a bit (okay, a lot) more censorship than in Spain so it may be edited in theaters for you, but if you're squeamish you may not want to see this..)

-My friend and I made some Rice Krispie Treats last week.  However, it was a challenge locating two out of the three ingredients.  Therefore, we used Choco Crack, a store brand of Choco Krispies since we couldn’t find regular Rice Krispies, and pink candy marshmallows, since regular marshmallows are hard to find too.  Even though we used different ingredients, they turned out really well!  I have to say, the chocolate twist is definitely worth repeating!  We made them at our friends’ apartment and then took them home to share with our host families.  My Spomma adored them, despite her preference for fruit desserts.  And get this – she wants the recipe!  Turns out these aren’t Trix and they’re not just for kids.  (A week and a half later I was able to find marshmallows for 4 euros and bag and regular Rice Krispies.  Good to know for next time.)

They're pink ovals with white centers.

That's cereal, not raw meat.

-A met my intercambio (Spanish conversation partner)!  She’s from Toldeo (city near Madrid) and studied PR in college, and now works at an advertising agency.  She’s just a little older than I am, and we hit it off right away.  She’s been studying English since she was three, so she has a bit of a leg up on me, but that’s okay.  The whole point is to help each other learn.  We met at a terrace bar last Wednesday and talked for over two hours!  It was awesome!

-Last night my friend and I decided to tailgate a football game.  But not just any football game - the Penn State vs Iowa game!  More excitingly, I am the sole Nittany Lion rep in Madrid this semester, and she’s the only Hawkeye.  It was awesome!  We got tons of snack food and huddled around my laptop in our friends’ apartment.  Even our non-Big 10 friends got in on the snack and football action, and we made a night of it.  Even though it took the first 35 minutes of the game to get the videos working (and we eventually settled for just audio), it was well worth it.  A successful night – and yes, PENN STATE WON!

-My favorite part of every week is weekend meal times with my Spomma.  This is when we have the most time to just sit and talk to each other.  It’s always so funny and interesting.  We can talk about nothing and everything at the same time.  Today’s conversation (over some fabulous potato and rib stew type thing) led to discussing hand gestures, figs, hiccups, and tongue twisters.  Fantastic.

Examples of a few fun trabalenguas (tongue twisters):
 

Tres tristes tigres triscaban trigo en un trigal.

Un tigre, dos tigres, tres tigres trigaban en un trigal.

¿Qué tigre trigaba más?

Todos trigaban igual.

Como poco coco como, poco coco compro.

Poquito a poquito Paquito empaca poquitas copitas en pocos paquetes.

Canning!

Last weekend was the first THON canning (to can: verb: to stand, dance, jump around, etc. with cans labeled "Help Kids Fight Cancer" requesting donations from generous witnesses) weekend of the season!  In case you haven’t heard, THON (Penn State IFC/Panhellenic Dance MaraTHON) is the largest student-run philanthropy organization and is devoted to conquering childhood cancer by partnering with the Four Diamonds Fund.  For those of you who haven’t heard me rant and rave about my favorite part about Penn State (I'd be surprised if you haven't), check out these links for more info! 

Here’s my favorite video from THON weekend (the 46-HOUR NO SITTING, NO SLEEPING, DANCE MARATHON FOR THE KIDS). 

 

Here’s more info on THON. 

Finally, HERE’S WHERE YOU CAN DONATE TO THON!  (If you kindly choose this option, PLEASE CHOOSE ORGANIZATION: STUDENTS ENGAGING STUDENTS!)

Shout out to my SES family – I heard you did a fabulous job CANNING FTK!!!!  I was so excited and inspired by this that I explained THON to my host mom (in Spanish obviously), and can now cross that off of my bucket list.  She was so impressed by what THON is and does!  FTK!!!

PS - Last year alone, THON raised $9,563,016.09 For The Kids.  Let's do it again!!

How To Fake Your Way Into Appearing Spanish 101

1)  Don’t smile at strangers.  Contrary to popular American belief, it is not polite.  It is just bizarre and confusing.  Smiling is a sign of recognition.  So if you don’t know me, don’t you dare smile at me.

2)  Walk into people and don’t excuse yourself.  Gently bumping into someone on the sidewalk or even pushing them to the point that they lose their balance is nothing to apologize for.  If you want to blend in, you should actually try to bump into others.

3)  Put your Metro map away.  Enough said.

4) Don’t wear sneakers and white socks.  These were the wise words from the po-pos in the security meeting.  While you’re at it, ditch the baseball cap, the camera, and the fanny pack.  But that’s just if you don’t want to be an American tourist.

5)  Be late.  By 9:00, I really meant 10:30.

6)  Talk with your hands.  If they are still while you speak, you’re doing something wrong.  Hand gestures convey just as much meaning as the words themselves.  When in doubt about how to say something in Spanish, wave your hands around like you’re talking about something important.

7)  Vale.  That is the one word you need to know to get by.  It means “okay” and you can answer questions and fill awkward pauses with it.  It’s a question, a statement, and exclamation all in one.

8)  Douse yourself in perfume.  A whole bottle should suffice.

9)  Do not refrigerate anything perishable.  That would be ludicrous.  And potentially healthy.

10)  Never use [the side of] your fork to cut food.  That’s what a knife is for.  Obviously.

Valencia - The Land of Paella, Oranges, and Humidity

I spent Friday and Saturday of this weekend I Valencia through an organized IES trip.  Never heard of it?  Impossible.  Ever bought an orange?  Well, there’s a good chance it was from Valencia.  Yum!  Unfortunately the orange trees that line streets and plazas are strictly decorative and the oranges are bitter and virtually inedible.  At first I was annoyed that anyone would consider growing a decorative fruit.  That seems stupid to me.  But if the oranges were the delicious kind and just grew on the sides of the roads, the trees would always be bare because no one can resist a tasty Valencia orange.  Other than oranges, Valencia is also known for its kick-ass paella!  I was so thrilled to be reunited with one of my favorite foods!  Madrid paella is kind of crappy and often resembles Rice-a-Roni, so I’ve been craving finely crafted paella for quite some time now.  Horchata (a drink made from tiger nut and resembles sweet milk) is also pretty popular in Valencia.  You can get it almost anywhere in Spain, but Valencia’s version is some of the best.

Huge paella pan.  Odds are looking pretty good that I'll be bringing home a dish this size (aka giant) to make paella all the time.  Unfortunately this wasn't all for me.

YUM.

As soon as our bus got to the hotel on Friday, we all ran to change into bathing suits to hit the beach in the little bit of free time we had before the walking tour.  It was a gorgeous beach on the Mediterranean, but one of the windiest I ever experienced.  I was pelted with sand for the two hours we enjoyed the sun and sounds of waves, and I am still finding it in my bags, shoes, pockets, and ears.  I deemed Valencia the Guinness World Record Holder for Most Humid City Know to Man.  It seemed appropriate since while on the beach my hair expanded.  It may also be the Windiest City Known to Man.  But that’s debatable.

Vamos a la playa

We went on a walking tour of the older, historic areas of Valencia and saw some more beautiful buildings (they’re all the rage in Europe).  I was glad to be in the group with my favorite tour guide (The same students from local universities give us tours every time we go somewhere, and Carmen is my favorite.  She has a soothing voice, knows what seems like the history and legends about everything Spanish, teaches me fun phrases and vocab, and once told me I could pass for a Spaniard.).  We saw the cathedrals (they’re everywhere), plazas, University, and various other buildings.  Since a cathedral wouldn’t be complete without it, there was another massive bell tower.  And what happens when you see a bell tower?  You obviously have to climb to the top.  So did I?  Of course.  Has Mother Nature gotten her revenge on me since I hiked against her will yet again?  Certainly.  But at least I got cool pictures.

Statue in the University.  This guy was a famous grammar nerd.  We'd get along.

The tower had 203 steps that were stacked so steep that I didn’t think I’d make it to the top.  They were also amazingly fashioned in a very dimly lit, incredibly narrow staircase.  And for the record, there was only one staircase, so those climbing up and those descending were getting in each others' personal space as they tried not to send anyone spiraling to an untimely doom.  Needless to say I had a death grip on the rusty handrail.  If you have vertigo, this was not for you.  Slow and steady was supposed to win the race, but everyone was so anxious to reach the top that it was a fast and steady sprint instead.  If you have cardiac problems, this was not for you either.  I proudly have pictures to remember this accomplishment, but less thrillingly I have a semi-swollen left knee and Charlie horses in my right calf.  As tough as it was, Masada still takes the cake on knee-crushing hikes in my lifetime.

Proof.

If Valencia were a person, she’d be a feverish, possibly menopausal woman.  Saturday morning started off gray and chilly.  Gray and chilly soon became mild thunderstorms.  Thunderstorms later turned to toasty and sunny.  You may also call her Florida (equally fickle, but more historic).  That put a damper (literally) on my day at the aquarium (which was divided into multiple buildings based on exhibit, so I was frequently out in the rain).  I took some pictures, but I didn’t use my camera at all at my favorite part – the seal exhibit.  Who knew seals were so freaking cool?  I just stood at their tank for about 20 minutes, completely mesmerized.  They’re cute too!  The aquarium was on the newer, more modern side of town.  It contrasts (and kind of clashes) with the older, historic side that we toured the day before.  However, the buildings are super cool to look at.

Old architecture.

Slightly more modern end of town.

In retrospect, the city was pretty neat.  But it still doesn’t rank in my Top 10.  Future travelers, unless your paella or orange cravings are overwhelming, feel free to skip Valencia.

Ten Fé, En Tí - Salamanca

Last weekend nine of us went on a little excursion to Salamanca.  The city is much smaller than Madrid, and beautiful.  It was a nice break to be walking city streets and not feeling so crowded all the time.  However, it is so easy to see virtually all of Salamanca in one day that I’m glad I didn’t choose to do my semester there.  I’ve been in Madrid for about a month now and there is still so much more to discover!

Northwest of Madrid (near Portugal).

Cute city street.

So how was Salamanca?  It was really fun!  We walked the tours suggested by travel books and saw many (if not all) of the historic sites.  We saw the cathedrals, the university, the library, etc.  Legend has it that if you spot the frog on the façade of the University of Salamanca you’ll have good luck (I’ve also heard you’ll have good luck in studies, and you’ll get married soon.  Silly legends).  Yes, I found the frog (with assistance from the tchotchke vendor who kept shining a light on it).  My host mom later told me I was supposed to look for an astronaut too.  Guess I’ll have to go back and find it...

Public library

Cathedral

The bell tower we hiked.

View from the top

Proof that I was there.

A bad angle of the University facade.

A close up of the frog (that just looks like a blog) on top of the skull.

I generally hate guided walking tours because they’re slow and boring, but just looking at historic buildings and reading a line or two from a guide book didn’t do this city justice.  Lesson learned – find the free city walking tours.

I was impressed by how clean Salamanca was, especially compared to Madrid.  There was so much less litter (and therefore fewer workers always cleaning up after people).  There was also less graffiti.  And the graffiti that I did find was much more upbeat and inspiring than the rebellious, angry graffiti of Madrid.

Motivational graffiti.  ("Have faith in yourself")

 

Since this was our first weekend adventure on our own, it was also our first hostel experience in Europe.  I packed my bed bug spray, and didn’t even have to use it!  Our hostel was cute and clean, and the owner was really friendly.  With nine of us we rented the two biggest rooms and had ourselves a slumber party!  

The walls inside were neon green.  Sweet.

A quick note on the nightlife in Salamanca – there was one bar that strictly sold shots for 1 euro each (which would be unheard of in Madrid, since you’ll be lucky if you can get a pack of gum for a euro).  In many bars you can play pool (as in billiards).  But in Salamanca, if you want to play pool, you’ll be able to play in a pool.  Sounds like an accident waiting to happen if you ask me, but it was pretty funny to see a pool in the bar.

The perfect end to the wonderful weekend was enjoying an ice cream cone from what I voted the Second Best Ice Cream in Spain while soaking up the sun and people watching in the Plaza Mayor (I had fresh cherry and vanilla!!).  We had some time to kill before our bus left, so we just sat in the middle of the plaza and relaxed.  There were at least half dozen weddings that morning, so it seemed like the whole town was in the plaza in their dressiest attire waiting to celebrate.  There were also a few bachelor and bachelorette parties in the plaza and a Forest Gump scene reenactment.

Salamanca's Plaza Mayor is modeled after Madrid's plaza of the same name.  Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery?

But just look at that Plaza.  I'd want one just like it too if I had the space...

All lit up at night.

One of the many weddings.

So friends studying abroad next semester (and all of you other worldly readers), definitely consider putting Salamanca on your travel bucket list!

PS – sorry for the delay in updating here.  It was a struggle to remember the details, so I’ll try to post sooner next time.